Cross-Cultural Guidebook for Comenius Travellers

( by students from Poland, England, Romania, Germany, France and Finland: Kaja Ludwin, Joanna Kozie, Piotr Kurasz, Steven Worthington, Matthew Higham, Ralph Leech, Lavinia Constantin, Oana Comanici, Dragos Eugen Georgescu, Jessica Morill, Philemon Binder, Jan R. Path, Vincent Soubiran, Camille Thomas, Remi Meunier, Jennie Laine, Milla Laine, Heini Naskali, Anne Kaita, Susanna Jussila )

 Meeting a Stranger

• You have to be friendly but you do not have to say "Hallo" to every stranger you meet.
• It is usual to smile, shake hands and make eye contact.
• Talk about something superficial (e.g. weather) in order to find some common ground.
• Young people have different reactions when they meet an adult stranger from meeting a younger person.

 Introducing yourself

• You have to say your name and shake hands.
• It is polite to ask "How are you?" or something like that.
• Exchange names, nationalities and where you live.
• Be normal!!!!
• Smile (but not too much!!)

 Greeting somebody older than yourself

• Give more respect to older people!
• Be respectful.
• Speak properly, and greet them more formally (eg. Shake hands).
• To people of your age you just say "Hallo!" and maybe wave your hand a little bit.
• To older people it is better to be more formal and say " Good afternoon!" , shake hands and use Mr and Mrs in front of their family names.

 Talking to a new aquaintance

• You can use the first name when you talk to people of your age.
• It would be polite to use the surname and if neccessary the titles for adults.
• In most countries, teachers are addressed by their surnames, however, in Finland no official names/ titles are used, in the other countries, yes.
• If they are much older than you, use their surname. Wait for their permission to use their first name.
• Be presentable.
• Be nice and polite - e.g. use titles.

 Speaking

• Please do not shout but talk clearly and in a friendly way.
• It is nice to look into the face but not staring in the eyes and smile.
• You can naturally say 'no' if necessary, but in a friendly way.
• When you say 'yes', just say 'yes' and thank them.
• Remember to say "please" and "thank you"
• It is always better to say something than nothing.
• Speak normally for yourself!
• Nod and look at the people you are talking to, and acknowledge them. Be (or seem) interested.
• To join a conversation, walk over and say hi, and just join in!
• Accept silence.
• When you say no, explain yourself (or find a good excuse!).
• Don't swear.
• Eye contact can be used and, also, interjections are sometimes used to express interest. It is impolite to talk very loudly, though sometimes it is necessary.

 Safe topics

• The weather, school topics and maybe typical behaviour and traditions of your home country.
• music, news, today´s happenings, cinema
• family (brothers, sisters etc.)
• hobbies
• sport (be careful).
• food, cars.

 Bad topics

• religion?
• very personal things ( family, illnesses, money )
• criticising the others' culture/ country/ behaviour
• politics, smell, money, or physical appearances.
• sex, family affairs

 Being Direct

• Say what you mean / what you really think (most of the time), but be polite.

• Get to know them before being direct on something controversial.

 Punctuality

• Try to be on time but it is not too bad if you are a little bit too late, round about 10 min. are ok
• It can be ok when you are much too late if you have a good explanation
• Tell them in advance if you're late.

 Dinner time

• Be on time - no more than 5 minutes either way.
• Don't be too early to someone's house for dinner.
• Wait for everybody is served to begin eating, copy your family/country habits.
• Wait for everybody is served to begin eating, copy your family/country habits.
• You should also try to say nice things, usually after having had the food. Also while eating, it sounds polite to say you like the food.
• You have to be honest, if the food is really bad , otherwise say something nice to your hosts.
• It is generally OK to leave some food on the plate.
• It not polite to leave food, if you've asked for more ; if it's just too much say so.
• At the end of the meal say`Thank you for the meal', and say something about it.
• Simply thank you or simple variations of this.
• In France, all the males must stand when a female leaves the table.
• Thank people who gave you the food if you're invited
• Just be polite.
• For a visit, wine is appreciated, flowers but common ones.
• Take care with roses!!!!!!!! (red is the colour of love….)
• Please/ thank you/ sorry

• Usually, if you don't use them, you seem quite `rude'

 Staying with a host family

• It is polite to bring a typical "thing" from your country as a gift.
• Try to bring something typical from your country/region/town as a gift (e.g. food, sweets….) to thank, show you appreciate
• Ask before you move freely in the house. Don't help yourself to things always. Often you are allowed to move freely in the house but do not go into the parents bedroom.
• It is better to bring your own cosmetics/shampoo….. with you.
• If you forget something e.g. shampoo at home, you first have to ask if you can use the stuff in the bathroom etc.
• Take your shoes off inside the house.
• Please say "Thank you for the food" or something like that after you had your meal.
• Don't be too informal about the way you get dressed, just take care about the situation / plans …
• Wait for they ask you before making suggestions where you want to go, what you want to see..
• Don't drink too much alcohol, (or ask for it) keep clear !!!!!!! You can drink what is there on the table.

• Often, the host asks if you need anything, and encourages one to ask if they need anything.
• Be yourself, try to be natural, and consider you have to follow the habits, and don't act as if you were in your house.
• Make effort to get on well with your family
• Leave your room and bed neat, cover it.
• Polite, friendly, open minded, respect the family.
• Only give one gift (at arrival or departure) , then send a thank you card when you get home.
• In some countries you are expected to give a gift before leaving, it is polite.
• Say very many thanks and something nice before you're leaving.

 Other things to notice

• You have to bring warm clothes (gloves, hats,…), but it depends on the weather and season of course.
• Depends on where you are going as to what clothes must be taken.
• It is also appreciated to bring some smart clothes with you if you go out.

• Take casual clothes, and maybe some good clothes as well, just in case

 After the visit

• You have to send a ´"thank you postcard" to your host family after the visit after you have come back home.

Yes, thank- you cards should be sent to the host family whence one has returned to one's household.